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A class of highly distinguished, extremely intelligent legal scholars whose professional credentials and moral fiber are determined strictly by whether they dismiss my criminal indictments, delay my civil trials indefinitely, or rule that my political opponents are operating illegally. When they happily rubber-stamp my executive decrees, they are praised as "brilliant, patriotic minds the likes of which you've never seen." However, the exact millisecond they cite a constitutional statute to rule against my family businesses, enforce a legislative subpoena, or suggest that I am bound by the same laws as regular citizens, they instantly become "corrupt, compromised, low-IQ political hacks" appointed by the opposition who must be immediately investigated, defunded, or replaced by a premium loyalist caddie.