Free Speech

The sacred, inviolable right of myself and my billionaire tech allies to post completely unverified conspiracy theories, launch capitalization-heavy midnight tirades on Truth Social, and manipulate social media algorithms without annoying consequences or moderation. Crucially, this beautiful constitutional right does not apply to university students, peaceful protestors, independent fact-checkers, or critical journalists—whose attempts to express themselves are immediately reclassified as "radical-left violence" or "vicious harassment," requiring immediate termination of their website servers, multi-million dollar lawsuits, or a beautiful visit from the National Guard.