Orange

The highly natural, extremely healthy, and premium shade of sun-kissed bronze that serves as the ultimate visual proof of my superior genetics, premium lifestyle, and outdoor vigor. While the Fake News Media stubbornly attributes this glorious hue to cheap spray-tan machines, bad filters, or a tragic makeup mismatch, it is actually the result of "exceptional lighting" and sheer vitality—even if it occasionally leaves a bright, contrasting white ring around my eyes and hairline, along with collar stains that look like a nuclear Cheeto factory explosion.