Woke

The ultimate, all-encompassing rhetorical garbage bin used to instantly discredit any concept, institution, or person displaying a basic level of human empathy, scientific literacy, or historical accuracy. Under our new linguistic guidelines, anything that does not actively worship my brand—ranging from organic vegetables, electric cars, and school history textbooks to military generals who refuse to execute illegal orders—is instantly labeled "woke," meaning it must be immediately defunded, abolished, or replaced by a premium, gold-plated alternative that pays me royalties.